Michelle Wegner

Gifted to Lead part 3

I realize this is the third post I have written about the Gifted to Lead conference I went to last week.  Nancy Beach and Nancy Ortberg blew me out of the water, and I've been mulling over what they had to say, as well as trying to take in everything all the speakers from the Leadership Summit had to say the past two days. 

One thing that struck me particularly was the pain that both Nancy's endured as leaders early on.  Nancy Beach talked about having a recognizable leadership gift in high school.  Her youth leaders paired her up with a guy who was a fairly new believer and kind of "rough around the edges".  They did this so Nancy could "lead through him."  She was called the "secretary"...and pretty much everything the guy said to the group, Nancy had written out ahead for him.  Women were not to be leaders in the church back then. 

I was thinking about the pain they both talked about.  I was thinking that I am so glad that strong women like them paved the way for this generation and the next and the next generation of women leaders.  They were not trying to be "one of the guys".  They were (and still are) uniquely feminine women, just doing the things God has gifted them to do.  They are not trying to take the place of men in the church. They just do what they are called to do.

Because of women like them who serve God and the Church with a humble, yet strong spirit, many other women will be able to follow after them.

I know I probably will never meet either Nancy.  I would hope I could express my profound gratitude to them for paving the way for me, my three daughters, and countless other young women who are watching them and modeling their own leadership after their humble, yet courageous leadership.

Following

I love conferences.  The Leadership Summit has been great, as always.  I was so fortunate to be able to go to the Gifted to Lead women's conference yesterday.  One thing I feel I am lacking in my life are women mentors.  I am so grateful for women like Nancy Beach and Nancy Ortberg.  They don't have to do what they're doing.  They have chosen to invest themselves in the lives of other women leaders who have a specific vision and calling from God.  These ladies are strong women of God.  I truly do want to be like them when I grow up.  I hope the decisions I make in my life will lead me to a place where I can help a lot of women stand firm in their faith and find their place in this world.

For now I just want to keep doing the next right thing, following Jesus where ever he leads me.

Between the Skunk and the Opossum

My mind has been mulling something over for a few days now.   I've felt bad about it, mulled it over some more, talked with Rob about it, then finally prayed about it on my walk this morning.  Somewhere between the dead skunk and dead opossum that have been laying on Adams rd. for about 3 months, it hit me.

I seem to have this ability to not fit anywhere.  In the Pastor's Wife world, in the Blog world, the Twitter world, the Park Mom world, the Room Mom world...the McDonalds Mom world, none of these groups seem to fit me.

But, where I do fit is this:  I fit with those who have their gaze fixed on Jesus.  Those who have seen His face and won't turn back.  Those who are determined to see God's Kingdom established on Earth as it is in Heaven.  I am perfectly at home with the friends who look least like me.  These are the ones who share my heart.      

That doesn't mean I don't want to be friends with anyone who doesn't love Jesus...quite the opposite.  I think I love those the most.  The ones that are hard for me to get are those who blog for themselves, Twitter for themselves, Have self-absorbed lives and self-absorbed children.  I still love them, but I probably won't be hangin with them.

Guess that's the inspiration you'll get from a dead skunk and opossum.

 

 

 

Come and Listen

Dr. Bob talked about the Spiritual Discipline of Solitude last night.  You can well imagine that there is not much quiet at our house at any given moment in the day.  When the moments come like any good parent,  I wonder what's wrong, where the girls are hiding, and what happened.  My girls are never, ever quiet.  When I am alone, I can think.  My head clears and I can talk to God. 

Before I had kids, I would walk for hours and pray.  Nothing got in my way.  I would pray until I was finished, then I would go on with the rest of my day.  Walking was my number one way of keeping my heart in line with God's.  Now our house is crawling with kids, dogs and whatever other creatures the girls bring in from outside morning and night.  Along with those obstacles to solitude, there is this crazy rheumatoid arthritis thing.  It has kept me from walking for a long time. 

Last night I felt like Dr. Bob drew a line in the sand.  Am I going to commit to this or not?  I went walking this morning.  I grabbed Maddie's ipod and listened to David Crowder's "Come and Listen" over and over again.  My heart and head were clear.  I was able to connect with God in a way I hadn't in a long time.  Solitude is a very good thing.  I'm hoping for a lot more of these moments this summer.

Camp Adventure (from an old person's perspective)

Rob and I have been to Camp Adventure every summer since 1992.  That would make this our  16th summer of camp.  My role has changed over those 16 years, and so has my perspective.  I will never forget the first few years of camp.  I remember kids like J Aquilla,  Amber Cox  (Beeson) , John Keim,and so many other now men and women who were then just kids.  I was only 19 myself, so I was a kid too. 

Those first years of camp were special, because of the environment I saw Mark and Sheila Beeson had created there over the past few decades.  I had never been to a place that was so close to "Heaven on Earth."  Before we coined the phrase "Bringing Up there Down Here," that's what Camp Adventure was.  And yes, I am talking about a camp for 6th-8th graders!  I had never been to a place where there were no practical jokes, no cut-downs, no negativity, only love, encouragement, and building one another up. 

Being the 35 year old, one of the "elderly" at Camp Adventure now, I walk around the whole week and just watch, wonder, and pray.  I don't have a group of middle-schoolers to counsel, but I have my own small group of 3 girls.  It is one of the only places on Earth I can take them and just say, "Watch"  "Watch J Aquilla.  He's married to Angie now.  They love Jesus.  Just watch them."

"There's Brooke and DC.  They love Jesus.  Watch what they do."  Watch Pastor Dan lead worship.  Watch the kids raise their hands to Jesus.

My kids do watch.  They are transformed every year by living in a place that is "Brining up There Down Here." 

If you are sending your kid to camp next week, or in July, you are doing the right thing.  They will be in an environment of love and acceptance like they have never known. 

I can't wait!

Rusty Tools

I'm starting a new small group tomorrow.  It has been born out of a desperation I have been feeling to draw nearer to God.  I have seen many of my friends floundering in their faith for a while as well to be quite honest.  It's time to step it up, take off the masks, and look at one another and to our God and see what He has for us.  Where does He want us to grow?  What does He want us to quit?  What does He have to say to us about prayer?  Do I pray enough?  Do I even know how to pray?  How much am I reading the Bible? 

God has given us so many tools that go unused, like the unused lawn and garden stuff we hang on the walls in our garage during the winter.  He wants us to use the tools of the Spiritual Disciplines year-round.  I feel like I pull these tools out when it's convenient for me, or when I feel a nudge, or a twang of guilt.

Maybe your "garden tools" are clean.  Maybe you've been working with them already .  Maybe they aren't rusty like mine.  I'm taking mine out tomorrow, looking them over with some friends, and seeing what we can learn on how to use them together.

I welcome you to join me.  The blog I have started for this group is called Further up, Further in.  My favorite books ever are the Chronicles of Narnia books.  I have read and re-read them ever since I was in 2nd grade.  The final book entitled "The Last Battle" is about the end of the Narnian world.  As the world was crumbling around them, they had to march "further up, and further in" to the land Aslan called them to.  The land crumbling around them was dying, and yet they looked ahead and saw Aslan's land, the "real" Narnia.  Where everything in Narnia was like a paper copy of what they saw ahead of them. 

Further up, and Further in is how I want to live.  I want to live every day walking closer to Heaven, seeing new things with my eyes.  Raising my eyes up to what is real.  Seeing Heaven for what it is.  Seeing earth as the paper copy of Heaven.

This new blog will be a reflection of what God is doing in my life and yours, if you choose to participate.   Feel free to be a lurker, or to be fully engaged in conversation.  I have even opened up this blog to some "guest bloggers", so the conversation will be more than just my own boring self.  I look forward to seeing you there!

Freedom From the Meanies

I have grown weary of mean people.  In the past few weeks, I have had a few people say some pretty nasty things about me.  I hate conflict/confrontation, so this is especially difficult for me.  I am a very easy-going person.  It really takes a lot to ruffle my feathers.  I can get along with just about  anyone.  I credit a lot of this to being the only girl in a family of 3 brothers, 9 boy cousins, and pretty much all boys on our block growing up.  I can usually roll with it.  Take it as it comes.  That's why it's so difficult for me to understand why it's so hard for other people to just get along.  I am by no means a "master" of this skill, but the growing up in a large family as well as knowing the love of Jesus has really helped me out of a lot of tough situations.

I've got a special friend who I go to when these kinds of things happen to me or Rob.  She is a woman who has "been there-done that" before.  Her and her husband have been involved in public ministry for over 40 years.  I ran some of these thoughts and feelings past her, and I wanted to share some of the precious words she shared with me. 

My friend, always think of Jesus who was maligned, spit on, lied about and then brutally murdered.   If he were alive today, you can be sure some angry soul would put something on the Internet for all to see.

Go back to I Peter 2:19-25.  This Peter said is part of what we are called to.  My what a change in his heart since those horrible days of fighting back before the cross.

  Read it over and over until it becomes a part of you.

Michelle, you know who you are.  You know who Rob is--and people can see through lies like this because they know you too.  So pity such a person who needs to try to harm others to gain attention.  It's the saddest thing--do play all of your life to your heavenly coach--not to the grandstands below.

I believe your faith can make this turn.  A sacrifice for Him.  You be first to live against the vengeance driven society we are now living in. 

May your experience in worship tomorrow be freeing dear one.

Remember the Pharisees were once devout people--turned mean--without the love of God we would all become mean. (~)  The trick is not hating those who hate or you are caught in the same trap--think about that! (~)

Have a great week--

The words of wisdom from this friend now in her early 70's are life to me.  She has guided me through some pretty rough storms the past few years.  I hope I can be this kind of friend to the younger generations as I age.

Dr. Angie

My friend Angie is a Doctor!  A real one!  I am so proud of her, I can't stand it.  I met Angie when she was around 12.  She was so shy she wouldn't look at me or talk to me.  It took a while, but slowly, I realized that there was a very silly, funny little girl under all that shyness.  Very quickly after that we became good friends. 

Angie gave her life to Christ at an event we were a part of as a Youth Ministry.  Very soon after that, God made it so clear to her, us, her family, etc. that she was supposed to be a doctor.  I have never met another girl more tenacious in her goals.  Not only was Ang to be a doctor, but she was to be a doctor making no money, serving the poor and less fortunate in third world countries.  God made the vision clear to her.  Her parents are amazing.  They gave her every ounce of support possible.  Who would want their daughter to grow up, become a doctor in some strange third world culture, make no money to support them in their retirement so they can live happily ever after?

The Qualey's are amazing.  Angie is amazing.  I am SOOOO proud to be in a sort of mentoring relationship with her.  I only hope I can keep up with her, because she is way smarter and stronger than me.

Angie, Rob and I are so proud of you and we love you!

I still don't think you're old enough to date boys.  I can't get my head around that one.  :0)

Top 10 Books

Here's a list of the top 10 books that have shaped my thinking and rocked my world:

1. The Hiding Place-Corrie Ten Boom
2. No Compromise-Melody Green
3. The Chronicles of Narnia-C.S. Lewis
4. Till We Have Faces-C.S. Lewis
5. Amy Carmichael of Donhavur-Frank Houghton
6. Bruchko-Bruce Olson
7. The Ragamuffin Gospel-Brennan Manning
8. A Severe Mercy-Sheldon Vanauken
9. High Call High Privelege-Gail MacDonald
10. Edges of His Ways-Amy Carmichael
11. Spiritual Classics-Richard Foster

Eleven, I know.  How can I narrow it down to ten?  Eleven was hard enough.  The list of books that have shaped my soul is endless.  This is a small (very small) sample.

Things as They Are

I stumbled across a rare treasure a few weeks ago.  I briefly mentioned it when I wrote this post about Amy Carmichael.  It is actually a 350 page "letter" to her mission board back at home to report to them about the atrocities looming all around her in Southern India.  It was considered scandalous, outrageous and a gross exaggeration.  Civilized Christians could not believe such things could be happening in that day and age.  People love to read "dirt," thus launching Amy into the public spotlight.  It was written in 1901, and is now out of print. The cheapest volumes on Ebay or Amazon go for $225 right now.  I have been dying to read it for 3 years.  Thanks to someone crazy enough to scan it in page by page, the entire book is available online now. 

The darkness that pervaded in Southern India at the time is shocking to me.  Child brides were common (as young as 8 years old).  Child prostitution was rampant.  Beatings of women and children were as common as a regular argument would be for us today.  Poisoning those who defected from their caste's was also extremely common.  It seemed as though every family kept a bottle of poison in their home "just in case."  A Hindu becomming a Christian was a death sentence to him and his family. 

At one point in Amy's report, she said that someone had done the math.  At the rate Christianity was then growing in Southern India, it would take 20,000 years for the Nation to become a Christian nation.  She didn't believe it then because she knew God's heart for those people, and she knew the power of the Holy Spirit.

Our friend and first International GCC staff member, Rajendran, says that the times when he is feeling tired from the load of ministry, or depressed, he will go and sit on the graves of the missionaries who brought the light of Jesus to India.  He said he goes there to weep and rejoice at the sacrifices they made to bring Christianity to such a Heathen nation.

It was the most surreal experience for me to read this book.  The whole time I was reading it, I felt like God was showing me an eyes open vision of direct answers to Amy's prayers for Southern India 100 years ago.    What a joy and priviledge to be a part of the work God is doing there!

Amy

Amy Carmichael is dead.  She has been for some time now.  She actually died on January 18, 1951.  She was originally from Ireland and left there to serve the poor and extremely impoverished women and children of Southern India.  She arrived there at a time when child temple prostitution was rampant.  Sex slavery was commonplace.  She published a report for her mission board entitled "Things as they Are" after the first years she was there.  For her day and age, the report was so graphic and the tales so brutal, her mission board sent it back to her and told her she needed to edit out the nasty details and send them back a copy that could be shared in public.  She sent back the same manuscript.

Amy was a founder of an orphanage that rescued children and babies from child prostitution at the temples.  She ran this orphanage for years and years.  One night while she was out on her own, she tripped and fell, breaking her leg.  A simple break.  Everyone thought she would be better in a matter of weeks.  Her leg did not heal.  She did not get better.  She laid bed-ridden for the next 20 years.  There was no Tylenol.  No Advil.  No relief whatsoever for 20 long years. 

I am studying her life right now.  I love to study the lives of those who have gone before me and been successful at keeping their hearts and minds strong through adversity.  I love to study the ways Jesus reached out to them and guided them through their trying circumstances. 

The pain in my own back is persistent at this point.  It goes from mildly annoying to incapacitating on a very random basis.  I think I am getting the treatment I need right now, but it will be a while before I am back to fully functioning.  Amy's books remind me that Jesus is a breath away.  He has not "laid us up", or "cast us aside" in these moments of pain.  He has only relocated us, reassigned us.  The lessons he can teach through pain and adversity make us strong as stone. Focused.  Attentive to His voice...

So many lessons from her life...I can not count them.  I am so thankful for this friend.  I can not wait to meet her some day in Heaven.  I can just see her in her Indian Sari, sitting at a table with a cup of chai for me and her to share.  We'll have a lot to talk about. 

Wanted:Mentors Dead or Alive

I currently have 3 Spiritual Mentors.  Two are dead and one is alive.  Amy Carmichael lived at the early part of this century, and spent most of her life in Southern India, bedridden, yet running an orphange for 300+ "temple children" she rescued from horriffic lives as child slaves.  Corrie Ten Boom lived in Amsterdam, Holland in the Netherlands during the middle part of this Century.  Corrie and her family were Christ-followers who hid Jews in their own home during the Holocaust, and were all sent to the concentration camps when they were caught.  Corrie's entire family were killed.  She was the only relative to emerge alive.  Gail MacDonald is alive and well in New Hampshire.  She and her husband have served in full time ministry for 40+ years, and have been down many roads I am constantly learning from.  I feel like Amy and Corrie hold my hands, and Gail walks behind me, guiding me and showing me the next way to go.

I think it is important for every person who calls themselves a follower of Christ to get a mentor, whether they are alive or dead ones.  There are so many fascinating biographies of Christians who have withstood absolutely remarkable odds and given Jesus the glory for the things He accomplished through their adversity and trials. 

If you don't have a mentor, find one!  I think the dead ones are the best ones, because you have a complete picture of thier lives.  (although, I am very happy Gail is alive and so I can chat with her semi-regurlarly) 

I would recommend not just reading one book about the mentor you choose, read several!  One author tends to write from a certain perspective, maybe glorifying details of the life of whomever they are writing about.  I like to get lots of angles and perspectives to get a bigger picture of the person's life.

Aside from daily Bible reading, I have found that choosing to study the lives of those who have gone before me to be one of the most helpful and effective methods of Spiritual disciplines for me.  I think about Amy, Corrie, and Gail on almost a daily basis.  "Would Amy be complaining about nail polish?" "Would Corrie complain about the lump in my pillow?" "Would Gail be gossipping about this person or that person?"

I carry these friends close to my heart.  I'm glad I've met one face to face on this side of etertnity.  I can not wait to meet the other two on the other side!

Who are your mentors?  I'd love to hear about who they are and why you chose them!

My Friend Gail

I have a friend named Gail Macdonald.  She is an amazing woman of God.  She is also a Pastor's wife, and has been down the road way ahead of me in her walk with Jesus.  I had the opportunity to meet Gail a few years ago when Lori Salierno invited a group of women to join her on a trip to Gail's house in New Hampshire.  Lori talked about Gail, and how something stirred inside of her when Gail spoke.  I knew I needed to meet her.  It took me all of 5 seconds to fall in love with Gail.  We had an amazing weekend retreat with Gail that lead to a friendship that I treasure deeply today.

This is a photo of me and Gail from the women's retreat in April 2006.  Gail is so nice to me.  I am always asking her questions, emailing her with my dilemmas and the drama of my life.  I enjoy probing her (incredibly intelligent) brain for what's next as far as books and learning go for me.  When I asked Gail what books she thought I should recommend to people who are followers of Christ, she gave me a great list.  It is by far NOT an all-inclusive list, but for people who are trying to follow Jesus, these books are tried and true, and pretty core to what a Christ-follower's path of learning should follow.  So, here's the list:

My Utmost for His Highest Oswald Chambers;

The Celebration of Disciplines- Richard Foster;

The Knowledge of the Holy- A. W. Tozer;

Where is God When it Hurts- Philip Yancey

Ordering Your Private World - Gordon MacDonald (Gail and Gordon are married) :)

I am so thankful for Gail's friendship.  My hope is that everyone can find a "Gail"..someone who is down the road just a bit farther than they are.  Someone who can be a guide, a friend and a mentor.